​Charlie+H.-+Favorite+Quotes

Charlie H.- Favorite Quotes

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. [|**Josh Billings**]

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. [|**Bill Cosby**]

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. [|**P. J. O'Rourke**]

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. [|**Rodney Dangerfield**]

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it. [|**Mitch Hedberg**]

I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong. [|**Bertrand Russell**]

I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess. [|**Dennis Miller**]

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago. [|**Will Rogers**]

If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style. [|**Quentin Crisp**]

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. [|**Laurence J. Peter**]

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. [|**Rita Rudner**]

Life is hard. After all, it kills you. [|**Katharine Hepburn**]

My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing. [|**Emo Philips**]